No Longer Mad at “Something New”

Best-selling author and blogger Denene Millner writes about no longer being mad at seeing a black man with someone other than a black woman:

Yup, I used to be one of them—the black woman who would throw dead fish eyes and hella shade in the direction of African American men who dared high-step with white women draped on their arms. It didn’t matter who they were or that I didn’t know them from Adam or that they might have really liked each other: If he chose her, I took it personal.

Really personal.

It felt like an affront, see? Like black men who chose white girls over ones who looked like their mamas were making an indictment against African American women—saying under no uncertain terms that we were not good enough to date them or wear their rings or birth their babies or spend their money. To live in their happily ever after.

Plenty of sistahs had my back on this—would hold war councils discussing the latest brother to fall over into the white side. We’d spit out their names: Quincy Jones. Charles Barkley. Kobe Bryant. Tiger Woods. Taye Diggs. Terrance Howard. Ice-T. The list runs deep. And then we’d shake our heads and swear on our future kids’ eyes that black men, especially the well-to-do ones, couldn’t handle black women. Our strength. Our attitudes. Our low tolerance for the bull.

And then, well… I grew up.

Keep reading, and let us know if you’ve made it to this level of maturity!

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